what is it sebastian

i'm arranging matches

516 notes

hellotailor:

I hope everyone understands how vital The Only Lovers Left Alive is to my ongoing existance as a human and a woman and a person.

TILDA SWINTON AND TOM HIDDLESTON STAR TOGETHER IN A VAMPIRE MOVIE. I’m in paroxysms of spiritual agony already because Tilda Swinton is a shining beacon of hope and starlight in this dim, grimy universe where I just got laid off from my day-job, and Tom Hiddleston is a hilarious elf-creature who will probably do 914 embarrassingly sincere promotional interviews about how he developed his character into an indie-rock vampire with 90s grunge hair.

This picture is ridiculous and sublime in equal measure. WHAT HIDEOUS PORTMANTEAU NAME SHALL WE KNOW THEM BY, NOW? Tildaston? Hiddleswinton??

Filed under only lovers left alive tom hiddleston tilda swinton sheer unadulterated agony

13 notes

harrietvane:

#remember that first time peter got flustered and ran out of the room like socially awkward penguin? #and the entire universe was like YUP THIS IS IT #PAY ATTENTION PETER THIS IS LOVE #and it was the worst/best/best/worst day of his life #and remember that time harriet was in holloway nick after a) worst break up ever and b) super fun murder trial #and yet she still kind of accidentally started flirting with the silly ass with the wicked mind #for the pleasure of hearing him talk piffle #YOU’RE BOTH AWFUL

(Source: smokeandsong)

Filed under YOU'RE BOTH AWFUL dorothy l sayers i hate these people

75,485 notes

What if all women were bigger and stronger than you? And thought they were smarter? What if women were the ones who started wars? What if too many of your friends had been raped by women wielding giant dildos and no K-Y Jelly? What if the state trooper who pulled you over on the New Jersey Turnpike was a woman and carried a gun? What if the ability to menstruate was the prerequisite for most high-paying jobs? What if your attractiveness to women depended on the size of your penis? What if every time women saw you they’d hoot and make jerking motions with their hands? What if women were always making jokes about how ugly penises are and how bad sperm tastes? What if you had to explain what’s wrong with your car to big sweaty women with greasy hands who stared at your crotch in a garage where you are surrounded by posters of naked men with hard-ons? What if men’s magazines featured cover photos of 14-year-old boys with socks tucked into the front of their jeans and articles like: “How to tell if your wife is unfaithful” or “What your doctor won’t tell you about your prostate” or “The truth about impotence”? What if the doctor who examined your prostate was a woman and called you “Honey”? What if you had to inhale your boss’ stale cigar breath as she insisted that sleeping with her was part of the job? What if you couldn’t get away because the company dress code required you wear shoes designed to keep you from running? And what if after all that women still wanted you to love them?

For the Men Who Still Don’t Get It, Carol Diehl.

(via cottonbutts)

(Source: ashemo, via cocteautwin)

Filed under feminist rage